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Friday, September 14 - Ahh what a difference one good night's sleep makes

Charlie decided to let his parents get one decent night's sleep last night. We are profoundly grateful. Our well-rested Charlie seemed particularly photogenic this morning, so after two weeks with no updates, here's the 2nd update in as many days. 

Thursday, September 13th - Sleepy and back to work

First off, Charlie wishes a belated happy birthday to his Aunt Elissa!

Second, sorry for the lack of posts the past two weeks. Charlie's given up sleeping and lots has been going on. First of all, our nanny, Annis, started last week. Finding a nanny was a real adventure, but we're THRILLED with Annis. She's from a tiny West Indies island called St. Vincent. She's incredibly calm and patient and is wonderful with Charlie. I don't have any good pictures of her yet, but as soon as I have one, I'll put it up.

Other than the lack of sleep, Charlie is doing great. He's eating lots and getting downright chubby (as you can see in the photo). He's almost four months old now and he's doing lots of new things. He's good at grabbing things (especially my glasses) and hurling them to the floor. He loves holding his own feet (as pictured above). He also loves to wake up at 5:00 AM and make noise. Not crying, mind you, he just sits there and yells, coos, gurgles, giggles, yelps, etc. for a long time. If we weren't half-mad with sleep deprivation it would be really funny and entertaining. Actually, it still is funny and entertaining, even half-mad with sleep deprivation.

Of course, Annis starting was a prerequisite for Jessica going back to work, which she just did yesterday (Wednesday). Here's a picture of Jessica, all dressed for work, giving Charlie a goodbye kiss on her first day back to work.

So, between the sleepless nights (last night Charlie woke up at 9:00, 10:30, 12:00, 2:00, 3:00 and 5:00) and both of us being back at work, there's not a lot of time for photos and web posts. Frankly, it's all we can do to finish work, feed ourselves and go to bed. Hopefully we'll all settle into a rhythm here and start getting some sleep. In the meantime, my apologies for the lack of updates.

Sunday, September 2nd - A trip to the beach

Charlie wishes his aunt Rebecca a very happy birthday today!

Charlie loves to play Superman. When we play, he gets this very serious look on his and turns his head slowly back and forth, like he's looking around for trouble. It's endless fun, really.

 On Saturday, we took a trip to Long Beach with Betram, Hal & Rachel. Here they are on the boardwalk at Long Beach. Bertram's the one in the hat.

Charlie enjoyed the beach a LOT. 

 Charlie and Betram spending some quality time together on the beach.

And the last beach picture, Charlie looking very serious (and studly, I might add) on the beach.

And gratuitous cat photo of the day. Charlie never really liked being in this bassinet, but it seems to have found some happy occupants.

Monday, August 27th - Charlie's crib

Big thanks for Wrazen (our hero) for helping put together the crib and rearrange the bedroom. You're our hero, Wrazen!

 Here's Charlie hanging out in his crib for the first time.

Charlie looking at himself in his crib mirror.

Sarah (Wrazen's significant other) gave us this puppet. Charlie likes it.  

 

Last one, Charlie's view from the crib.  

Friday, August 24th - 7:00 AM - Back from California

We are back from a trip to San Francisco for Uncle Brodilama's wedding (CONGRATULATIONS BETH AND MATTHEW!). Charlie's got a new Aunt now, Auntie Beth. I foolishly didn't get any pictures of Auntie Beth (in fact, I took almost no photos the entire trip, being very busy with family and wedding duties), but I did get a picture of Charlie finally meeting the one aunt he hadn't met yet, my sister Elissa. Both Charlie and Elissa look pretty excited about finally getting together.

The picture below requires a little explanation. Charlie's Aunt Becca is an accomplished artist, and knitting is one of her specialties. She knitted Charlie this outfit, which is intended to make him look like a balding, middle-aged man in a wife-beater. Note the tank-top effect created by the white yarn and the flesh-colored yarn. Also note the sewed-on chest hair. At the back edge of the hat, you can see the male-pattern baldness hair. You can't see the three-dark threads of yarn that form a comb-over on the top of his head. You really have to see it in person to believe it. Oh yeah, and don't forget the anchor tattoo on his right arm. Pure genius. Quite in the spirit of the outfit, Charlie looks to be itching for a fight in this photo.

The picture below is Becca (who made the outfit above) and her marvelous dog, Maya, who is really one of the best dogs I've ever known (and I've known many). Maya thought Charlie was very tasty, but thankfully refrained from doing anything more than licking him.  

Grandma Vida and Grandpa Joel enjoying some time with Charlie out on the patio in Moss Beach, CA (a little ways south of San Francisco).  

A boy and his cow. Thanks to Matthew and Robin Benjamin for this great cow. Charlie smiles every time he sees it.  

Monday, August 13th - 8:00 AM - HAPPY BIRTHDAY UNCLE BRODILAMA!

A slightly drooly Charlie wishes his Uncle Brodilama (Matthew) a very happy birthday!

Quick update today. On Saturday, Jessica & Joshua took a turn with Bertram Danger Eagar, the 15 week-old son of our good friends Rachel & Hal. For three hours, Jessica and I were in charge of two baby boys. Here they are, hanging out, two babies for the price of one. B. Danger's onesie, by the way, says, "Mmmmmm...boobies." As expected, they found each other very interesting, but no so much so that they forgot to cry when they were upset.

Friday, August 10th - 7:00 AM - 12 weeks old

Charlie wishes himself a happy 12 week birthday today!

 Charlie is twelve weeks old today and doing fantastic. He's getting more and more fun every day, and has cracked us up with grins and smiles all week long. He's crying less, smiling more, and spending more and time awake and alert, taking in everything around him. He's just happy to be here, which is exactly how we want him to be. 

A few journeys with Charlie this week. We took another trip to the Peskay grandparents in Connecticut. Grandpa Joel was nice enough to drive down and pick us up and we took the train and then the subway back home. Charlie once again travelled like a champion. Here he is with Grandpa Joel in CT.

On Wednesday evening this week, Jessica and I decided to take a chance and go to a movie with Charlie. We took in a 7:00 PM show of Ratatouille (very good movie, by the way) and it went as well as we could have hoped. Charlie was awake and a little fussy in the early going, but there was an empty patch of floor in the back of the theatre where we could rock his stroller a bit and that kept him cool until he fell asleep. We made it through the whole movie with no crying and neither of us missed a minute of the movie. 

You know you're new parents when one of your proudest achievements is seeing a movie without having to leave in the middle.

When Jessica's not looking, daddy is teaching Charlie all the fighting arts he can. Here's Charlie practicing his left jab, doing his best Muhammad Ali impersonation. He needs to work on keeping his right hand in tight, but the jab actually looks pretty good. Another month or two and we'll start practicing his footwork.  Now I just need to find out if Title or Ringside make diapers.

And lastly, yet another gratuitous cat photo. One of these things just doesn't belong here, come on, can you tell which one?

Sunday, July 29th - 9:00 AM - Happy Birthday Grandpa Dirk!

Charlie wishes his grandpa Dirk and VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY today! 

Charlie is ten weeks old as of last Friday and getting more and more fun every day. He has developed a sporadic "fussiness" during nursing sessions, much to the consternation of Jessica, but we're hoping that will work itself out. It's such a guessing game when Charlie's at the breast and complaining: Is the milk not coming fast enough? Too fast? Does it taste funny? Is he just not hungry? Too hungry? We've been logging the "fussy feedings" for almost a week now and can't discern any pattern whatsoever. Oh well...hopefully it's just a phase.

In other news, Charlie now has enough control of his head (barely) to sit facing forward in his Bjorn carrier. He LOVES traveling this way and when sitting facing out in the Bjorn is content for as long a period (over an hour) as he's ever been without needing to sleep/nurse/swing/swaddle, etc. Here he is on his first day facing out with Jessica (trying to imitate Charlie's expressions).

We had some more visitors this week. Our dear friend Dawn came by with her children Thomas (four years old) and Sofia (15 months). Jessica and I felt quite humbled as Dawn came over with two children she easily managed by herself while Jessica and I were home together with just Charlie and barely managing to keep the household going. Dawn's got more practice, sure, but it's still very impressive. I tried (and failed) to get a good group shot, but I did manage to get this great shot of Sofia enjoying Charle's fire truck. This was gift from my aunt and uncle Melinda and Fred. Charlie's not ready for it yet, but if Sofia is any indication, he'll love it when he's 15 months old. 

Between fussy feedings , Charlie and Jessica did manage to take a great baby nap together yesterday afternoon. If this isn't a picture of peace and contentment, I don't know what is. 

And finally, one more gratuitous feng shui cat photo (the incredibly gorgeous quilt, by the way, was made by Charlie's grandmother, Jackie Putnam. She has made dozens of these quilts, and they're all amazing).

Sunday, July 22nd - 9:00 AM  - Vaccinations, Outings and Big Smiles

Charlie had his first round of vaccinations on Thursday night, including three (3) shots. As you can see below, he's recovered from the experience.  

For those of you who have not seen a baby get a vaccination, it's both horrifying and (honestly) a little bit funny. It's horrifying to have to cause pain to someone who can't understand why it's happening. Even more so, there's a degree to which it's not even a good idea for Charlie, as an individual, to get vaccinated. But, as George Costanza says, "We live in a society." So, vaccinations are for the greater good, even if they're not necessarily for Charlie's good.

Anyway, when you're holding a two-month old Charlie in your arms and he's calm and almost asleep and then gets a needle stuck in his thigh, it takes about three seconds for his reaction to fully materialize:

Second 1: His head and face turn read. VERY RED. 

Second 2: His mouth opens. No sound yet. Then...

Big thanks for John & Betsy Flaten for the Bjorn Baby Sitter. Here's some pics of Charlie enjoying his time in it. 

Doesn't get more fun than that. 

So, yesterday we went out with our friends Brooke and Peter and played pitch-n-putt (a shortened golf course where you only use a pitching wedge and a putter). We decided it was ultimately a bad idea to haul Charlie around a golf course, so Jessica and traded back and forth playing while the other sat under a tree w/Charlie. Gorgeous day here in NYC, and it was FANTASTIC being outside for most of it. Aferward we went to dinner at Sripraphai, a great Thai place in Elmhurst with a nice outdoor garden in back that's very baby friendly (the insanely spicy food is not so nursing friendly, but they toned it down for Jessica and Charlie). 

Bonus pic of cats coming, so anyone who only wants Charlie pics can ignore this. Our cats are named Loki and Modi (Loki's on top, Modi's on bottom), but we should have named them Feng and Shui, since they arrange themselves in harmonic ways like below ALL the time. If we bothered to take photos of every one, we'd do nothing else. 

Sunday, July 15th - 9:00 AM - Charlie's big adventure to the Midwest

Charlie looked a little apprenhensive about his first airplane flight (from JFK to MSP).

But there was nothing to worry about. Charlie slept like, well, a baby the whole way to Minneapolis.  

After a three-hour plane ride and a three and a half hour drive, Charlie met the one grandparent he hadn't met yet. Grandpa Dirk. Their meeting was definitely cause for celebration. 

 Very proud Grandpa.

 Charlie also got to meet his one living great-grandparent, Great-Grandma Trudy.

Charlie on his great-grandma's lap. Does he look happy or what?

 Charlie also got to meet his Aunt Becca and his Uncle Aaron on this trip. Here's Charlie with Becca.

Uncle Aaron, Aunt Becca, Joshua and Jessica getting rained out of disc golf. The flowered hats are the official disc golf hats.

Before we went north to Detroit Lakes, we stayed a couple of days in Minneapolis with our dear friend Eric, who picked us up from the airport, gave us his bedroom and fed us banana-stuffed French toast. He and Charlie look good together.  

If anyone can find me an adult-size hat like Charlie's, I'll be eternally grateful. I don't think I need the chinstrap, though.

Monday, July 2nd - 7:00 AM - Charlie's first trip

Charlie's first NYC taxi ride! In one of those wonderful baby moments, Charlie was getting very hungry by this point (after three hours of travel) and was starting to wake up. You can't breastfeed him in the cab (he's got to stay in the car seat), so Jessica was singing to him to keep him calm. Amazingly, it worked. For 30 minutes, every time Charlie would start to fuss, Jessica would sing and he would drift back to sleep.

Other updates: Charlie is a bit over six weeks old now and he's just about doubled his birthweight (meaning he now weighs around 12 lbs). He's still a very unfussy baby (although he did have an hour-long crying jag in Connecticut, shattering all previous crying records). 

Charlie smiles now (I'll try to get a picture for everyone) and adds new sounds and faces to his baby repertoire every day.

On Thursday, July 5th Charlie will take his first airplane ride (to Mpls). Wish us all lots of luck.  

Saturday, June 23rd - 8:00 AM

 Charlie is five weeks old as of yesterday (Friday) and getting more fun (and more plump and delicious) every day. He's got new expressions, new sounds, new moods -- the works. Any problems with Charlie are clearly our fault, because he's a dreamboat. 

Sorry for the long delay in updates, but this may be the norm from now on. It's hard to get good photos every day, and I'm realistic about what readers of this website want, and it's not my insightful writing, it's CHARLIE PHOTOS. So I don't really bother with an update unless I've got some good photos to go with it (more coming at the end of this post, by the way)  

Things are so much more manageable after five weeks, it's night and day from when we came from the hospital. Hard to tell if it's getting easier, or we're just getting used to it, but it's probably a bit of both. 

I'm writing this with Charlie snuggled up against me in yet another sling carrier, this one called the "Maya Wrap." If you want to make yourself stark raving mad, try sleeping two hours a night for three days and then watching these videos. Suffice it to say, four weeks ago the Maya wrap was a bit overwhelming, but with some sleep under our belts everything is easier. Charlie seems comfortable in the Maya wrap at the moment, in fact, I'll take a picture now:

 Took Charlie out for a walk yesterday afternoon (gorgeous weather lately here in NYC, which is a bonus). He was giving us all kinds of looks, and we managed to snap a few good photos. Here they are. 

Sunday, June 17th - 2:00 PM

HAPPY FATHER's DAY!

Today's update is short and sweet. A picture of what happens when two sleepy first-time parents  play a game of Scrabble. I should note that the word "zeemtefi" (across two triple-word scores and with a fifty-point bonus for using all seven letters) scored 248 points. 

Friday, June 15th - 9:00 AM

All's well in Putnam Peskay land. Had many visitors yesterday. Charlie's Great Aunt & Uncle (Fred & Melinda) came by for a visit. Then Rachel, Hal and their seven-week-old baby Bertram came by. Nothing like having two crying babies in our apartment. Seriously though, it's great for Jessica and Rachel to hang out together and have some solidarity. I really don't think anyone who isn't very recently a new mother can truly appreciate what the experience is like. I offer my ear to Jessica whenever she wants it, but I can never really understand what it's like for her to have this tiny creature (however cute he is in the pictures) clutching at her chest every three hours, or two hours, or one hour, or nonstop. But Rachel more than understands, she's going through the exact same experience.

A couple good pics today. The first one is titled "Shock & Awe." Our good friend Tanya adopted this term for Charlie's expression during his very alert state. Seems appropriate. 

The second picture is part of a body of evidence I'm building to prove that babies are actually super villains. Note, they are usually bald, small, and very demanding of their servants. Here's Charlie in a classic super villain pose, with the fingers interlaced. He's plotting something. 

Wednesday, June 13th - 8:00 AM

Jessica's boss at Harper Collins (Thanks Karen!) gave Charlie this shirt about a month before he was born, BEFORE she knew his name was going to be Charlie.  It's a little big on him, but he spit up on it anyway. He's flexible like that.

Charlie showed us another new trick yesterday while he was napping. Babies have something called a "startle" reflex, where they shoot their arms straight out like a mummy when they hear a loud noise or, for whatever reason, get startled. Well, Charlie was sleeping yesterday and startled, then left his arms straight out and slept for about a half-hour that way. The two-dimensional picture doesn't quite do justice to how funny this looked, but it gives you an idea.

Tuesday, June 12th - 10:00 AM 

The Putnam Peskays are doing good. Charlie's eating well, seems to be fattening up nicely and getting those chubby cheeks one normally associates with babies. 

I'm back at home until next Tuesday, enjoying my 2nd week of paternity leave. Things seem very manageable with both of us at home now. We might even have (gasp) leisure time this week. 

I promised some Charlie crying photos last week, so here they are. In spite of the lack of photographic evidence, Charlie cries plenty. That said, it's still usually obvious why he's crying and he can usually be soothed within a few minutes. Mostly, he just likes being held, jiggled, or given something to suck on. 

These three pictures were taken in this exact order, approximately five (5) seconds apart. Another suprising thing about babies (at least for me) -- They can go from screaming/crying to perfectly calm and back to screaming/crying in seconds. 

Sunday, June 10, 1:00 PM - Yet another sling carrier

The three Putnam Peskays enjoying a walk in Forest Gardens.

Thursday, June 7, 8:00 AM

I've come to the realization that we had plenty of second-hand knowledge about what life with a newborn would be like, but that all this second-hand knowledge is totally meaningless compared with the actual experience. I can't think of much else in life that is like this. Friends with newborns had explained to us how scary the first night home from the hospital would be, how relentless feedings every 2-3 hours around the clock would be, how heart-breaking our newborn's cry would be, and I felt like I heard and understood these things, but now that we're experiencing them, it's COMPLETELY different. Everyone talks about how hard it is, but it's really not possible to understand until you do it. I can try to explain what it feels like to be exhausted, desperate for sleep, alone in the dark at 1:00 AM, trying to let your spouse (who's just as desperate for sleep as you are) get some sleep, but your baby is crying and you're not sure why. I can try to explain what that's like, the feeling that you can't possibly go on anymore, you HAVE to sleep or you will lose your mind, but then you realize you HAVE to go on. Your baby needs you. Your spouse needs you. You have to find some strength somewhere and go on. 

I feel a kinship with other parents now that is palpable. I also feel the futility of really explaining to childless friends what this experience is like. I see now there is no way to explain it, you just have to do it to understand.  

And then, there's my experience two nights ago. Jessica desperately needed sleep and so did I. It was 9:00 PM and Charlie was fussy. I wrapped up Charlie in a blanket and laid down in bed with him on my chest. Still fussy. I jiggled him. Still fussy. Jessica's alseep. She needs to sleep. I offer Charlie my pinky finger to suck on. He's quiet. Suck, suck, suck. I fall asleep. My finger falls out. Charlie wakes up, I wake up, pinky back in mouth, suck, suck, suck. I fall asleep, finger falls out, Charlie wakes up, lather, rinse, repeat, etc, etc.

This went on for maybe three hours. It was WONDERFUL. It felt AMAZING to be able to soothe Charlie with the tip of my pinky finger, and it felt great to let Jessica get such needed sleep. It felt disturbing how raw my pinky finger got after three hours of Charlie sucking (mothers out there, you and your nipples have my undying respect).

Life goes on. Three lives go on. Beautiful weather in NYC this week. Jessica and I actually went out for a nice long walk with Charlie last night. Here we are, pretending to be normal people who can go out for a walk in the evening. Almost believable, eh? Seriously though, we were out for over an hour. It was great.

Either we haven't quite gotten the hang of any of our 96 different types of sling carriers, or Charlie just doesn't like them. Thus, the stroller. A few jiggles in the stroller on a bumpy sidewalk and he's fast alseep. 

Jackie left yesterday after two weeks of carrying the household. Not sure how we'll survive without her, but we still seem to be alive this morning. Our eternal gratitude to you, Jackie. THANKS!

Monday, June 4, 7:00 AM

Sunday was a wonderful day. Our ogre friend Rrrrrrrrrrrrrr came by to take Joshua out for a run and stuck around overtime to take Jessica for much-needed walk outside. Our gratitude knows no bounds, Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.  

 Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr somehow managed to get this action shot of me calming Charlie in a sling while making omlettes for everyone. Advanced fatherhood.

Also had another visit from the paternal grandparents and Uncle Brodilama. Remembered to get a pic of Uncle Bro this time.

 That's all the news for today, since I gotta go to work. Continued thanks to everyone for all your support.

Saturday, June 2nd, 1:00 PM

Crazy Charlie wishes his Grandpa Joel a happy birthday!!!

Charlie is two weeks and a day old now. The times, they are a changing. He's still our sweet Charlie, but the past few days he has definitely developed what the Australians dub the "5-o-clock grizzlies."  He gets very fussy and difficult to calm. So far, we've been having good success with the "5 s's" method promoted by Dr. Harvey Karp (author of "The Happiest Baby on the Block"), but even though this successfully gets Charlie to stop crying, Charlie still requires someone to sway him, swaddle him, shhhhhhh him and give him something to suck on (pacifier, finger, cat's tail, dust bunny, etc). He only requires this level of constant soothing for 5-6 hours straight.  Supposedly this goes away around three months of age, so only two and a half more months of this. Easy peasy. 

Got Charlie a mobile this week. Not sure he's getting much out of it yet. He looks very interested, but he's actually just staring at the side of his bassinet, which I guess is almost as good. He definitely likes looking at faces the best, but I couldn't find a bassinet with faces for the pictures.

Wednesday, May 30th, 7:00 AM - More Grandparents and a feeding frenzy

Charlie met Grandma Vida & Grandpa Joel yesterday. Only one grandparent left to meet (and we'll see you in July, Grandpa Dirk)!

BONUS! Here's a look at Charlie's paternal hippie Grandparents a generation ago. The baby is my older sister, Elissa (love ya, Sissy). 

By the way, the dog in the picture with my mom was named Charlie. 

We also met a new Charlie yesterday. Our sweet, Buddhist monk of a baby transformed into a voracious, insatiable feeding monster. He growls and snaps for his food. He fed for 2 1/2 hours straight, but wanted more. He fed all night and into the morning. He takes, at most, an hour break for sleep. Going on 20 hours of this so far.

We were warned this might be coming, but it was still quite a surprise to see our sweet little guy replaced with this growling, snorting, ravenous beast. Jessica, of course, is bearing the brunt of Charlie's feeding frenzy, so everyone send her all your strength and endurance because she's gonna need it. 

Tuesday, May 29th, 7:00 AM - Ten Things that have surprised us about Charlie

1) How fun he is -- Okay, I admit it. I'd always thought babies were pretty boring for their first three months or so. The ones I'd spent any time with seemed to me like sleeping, eating, crying, pooping machines. Obviously it's a lot different when you're spending 24/7 with your own baby, but Charlie is remarkable to spend time with. On Sunday I laid down to take a nap with him in the afternoon. He was a little fussy, but had just been fed, burped and changed so there was nothing left for him to do but fall asleep. I lay next to him and watched him kick and flail, making little grunts and noises the whole time. He never cried, or looked truly upset, so I resisted the urge to swaddle him (our usual approach) and waited to see what he did. After about ten minutes of this, one of his fingers found his mouth and he sucked it. Immediately his limbs stopped flailing and his whole body and face relaxed. Ten seconds later his eyes fluttered closed. Ten seconds after that he was asleep.

2) How strong he is -- particularly his grip.

3) His language -- We watched the Baby Language video from Priscilla Dunston and while he only seems to use one of the five words she talks about (Charlie does say "eh, eh, eh" when he needs to be burped), the video was great to watch in that it really got Jessica and I learning to listen to his sounds and what he does next to see if there's a correlation. We've already discovered a "I'm going to poop" sound. He "baaaaaah's" like a sheep.

4) How many noises he makes --  Squeaks, grunts, sighs, snorts, cries (few and far) but mostly just lots of different noises. Maybe he thinks he's talking (and maybe he is) but we just don't understand yet. 

5) How much he sees -- Within the first couple of days it was clear to me that he recognized Jessica's face. Now I'm sure he knows mine as well. It's amazing watching him "see" faces he knows. When he's alert and gets pulled into his vision range (10-12 inches) his face lights up. His eyes open wide, his mouth opens and his hands start grabbing. If he's upset (which in Charlie manifests as flailing arms and legs, but not crying) a look at one of our faces settles him right down (for 10 seconds, anyway).

6) How little he cries -- Going on day 11, I think Charlie still has yet to cry longer than one minute. Every time he has cried, it's been obvious to us why he's crying, but we just couldn't get the bottle/diaper/breast/swaddling blanket to him fast enough. I suppose there are days of nonstop wailing in front of us, but so far, Charlie has the temperament of a Buddhist monk. Come to think of it, I guess he kind of looks like a Buddhist monk.

7) How much he looks like his mom -- The general consensus among everyone is that Charlie takes 100% after his mom's side of the family. Lucky kid. Jessica thinks he looks a lot like her maternal grandfather.  

8) How much he poops -- 'Nuff said.  

9) How fast he's changing -- He's already noticeably stronger, noticeably more alert and you can almost smell the neurons firing in his brain when he's looking at things. Last night we practiced with a multi-paneled juggling ball we have and Charlie can already track it with his eyes and his head.  

10) How much sheer joy he brings us -- Seriously, we figured having a baby would be fun, but you'd also figure all the work, sleep deprivation and overwhelming fear would take some of joy away. But our utter bliss at everything Charlie does, at his very existence, trumps everything. Easily. I'd happily do a thousand times as much work as we've had to do for this little guy. He's bringing us joy of a new kind. All the cliches everyone talks about with children, but now we're experiencing them firsthand and it's WONDERFUL. 

Thanks, Charlie.

Monday, May 28th, 3:00 PM - Day 10 of life with Charlie

Short report today. Ten days into Charlie's life, we feel like we're making little (dare I say "baby") steps forward every day. Each day feels a little easier, a little more manageable, and a little more enjoyable than the last. 

Yesterday we were raided by some hungry ogres who tried to whisk away Charlie and gobble him up for lunch. The hairy one is named "Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr" and his partner in baby gobbling is Sarah. After a tussle, we were able to rescue Charlie from their clutches. 

Tomorrow daddy returns to work. I'm beyond sad that I'll be away from Charlie, but satisfied that I'm only leaving him to help ensure him a future with clothes, food, and college tuition. I feel somewhat like a hunter gatherer leaving his cave, nothwithstanding that I'll be taking the F train. 

The web posts will undoubtedly slow down now that I'm back at work, but I'll try to keep getting up something once or twice a week, especially if there's something new to report. 

Sunday, May 27th, 7:00 AM - Semblance of Normality

Jessica outside with Charlie on his first stroller ride

Jessica wanted to prove to the world that:

A: She does leave the apartment

B: She wears something other than her striped pajamas. 

So, today is the week anniversary of our trip home from the hospital. As promised by a few friends of ours who are also recent parents of newborns, we're developing a bit of a rhythm after the first week. Yesterday we had our friends Tanya and Doug over for a visit and dinner, and it was almost normal. We hung out, went for a walk, and ate dinner together. Charlie was certainly the focus of most of the conversation, but we got to hang out in a more or less normal way for a few hours. Today we're having some more houseguests (Wrazen, Sarah & Uncle Brodilama) and I'm even going out for a run with Wrazen and Uncle Bro.

Thanks to Uncle Aaron and Aunt Becca for this wonderful "Mysterio Predicts I will be a Monkey Wrangler" T-shirt. Of course, he peed all over it a few minutes after this photo, but the Monkey Wrangler will ride again, for sure.

Charlie had his first bath yesterday. He seemed to like it (or least not dislike it) right up until the end when he got a little cold. Here he is recovering from his first bath. One of the worst things about being a newborn (I think) is having no say whatsoever about someone putting a duck hat on you, taking a picture, and sharing it with all your friends and relatives. When Charlie is a teenager and tells us how much he hates us and how he never asked to be born, he will undoubtedly reference this photo.

Saturday, May 26th 8:00 AM  - Our Doulas

Our Doulas, Sarah Kaylor (left) and Cori Pleune (née Sisenwein), with Charlie.

If anyone out there is pregnant or planning to be pregnant, Jessica, Charlie and I would recommend you at least think about getting a doula. If you decide you want a doula (and you live in NYC), it would be impossible for us to more highly recommend two people than we recommend Sarah and Cori. 

Cori & Sarah work as a team, coming together to your home to meet with you a month or so before labor/birth. When your labor comes, whichever one of them is "up next" comes and assists at your birth. We got Sarah. Now, imagine this job. We called Sarah throughout the day on Thursday while Jessica's contractions were ten minutes apart and Sarah offered suggestions on how to cope, move things forward, etc. At around 7:00 PM, Jessica decided she wanted Sarah onsite, and within an hour Sarah was in our apartment, ready to stay with us until Charlie's birth. 

So, Sarah comes into our apartment at 8:00 PM and finds us both in the bathroom. Jessica's in the tub (where she would stay for almost five hours) and I'm laying on the floor next to her. Sarah pulls up a seat on the toilet, pulls out a natural electrolyte drink for Jessica, and within minutes has helped Jessica deal with the growing contractions by offering a clear breathing suggestion (slow down the exhales and make them deeper) that Jessica used throughout the rest of her labor.

Sarah's manner throughout the entire 14 hours she was with us (straight through the night, from home to hospital) was so unbelievably calm, supportive and nurturing that Jessica described the experience as laboring with her husband and a dear friend. She'd met Sarah exactly twice before, but she felt as though she'd known her for many years. 

So, let this post be our public thanks to Sarah (and Cori) and our sincere hope that many more women get to have their support at their labors.

Friday, May 25th 8:00 AM  - Belly Button Day

Today is Charlie's one-week birthday! On Charlie's one-week birthday, his umbilical stump fell off AND Jessica's belly button went back to being an innie (after being outed during pregnancy). So today is Belly Button Day.

Here's a pic of Mom and Charlie almost exactly one week after his birth. Just think, a week ago, Charlie was on the inside of Jessica's belly and now he's falling asleep on it. 

Not sleepy, a little sleepy, very sleepy. 

 Patiently awaiting a diaper change

Charlie has been a mightly hungry fella for the past 24 hours, which is a good thing, even if it kept all three of us (Jessica, Joshua and Jackie) busy round the clock. 

Last night for example, the plan was for daddy to give an 8:00 feeding while mommy got some needed sleep. Charlie sucked down a bottle at 8:00. At 8:50, he still was smacking his lips and sucking his fingers, so down went another bottle. Then, a monster poo. By 9:30 Grandma Jackie and daddy have got him cleaned up and ready for some sleep, but wait, Charlie is STILL hungry. So another bottle goes down the hatch. Then peeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. So another diaper change (it's 10:30 now) and his umbilical stump falls off, revealing his precious belly button (I'll get a pic later today). Then it's time for mommy to wake up at 11:00. 

The lesson as always, schedules are fantasies for the parents of newborns. 

Grandma Jackie with her grandson, Charlie.  

Yesterday I took a trip to the manly sounding "Upper Breast Side", one of those "only in New York" stores that's dedicated completely to breastfeeding moms. Store slogan, "You bring the breasts, we've got the rest." Well, I left my breasts at home, but I did have my shopping list:

1) Two 27 mm medela flanges

2) A hands-free breast pump bustier

3) breastmilk freezer storage bags

All items fulfilled in about 30 seconds. Gotta love NY. 

Thursday, May 24th 10:00 AM

Sorry, no new pics yet. I'll try to get some up later today, but no promises.

Continued thanks to everyone for all the help, good wishes, flowers, cards, gifts, etc. Means the world to us.  

Charlie is spending more time in active alert state, which is very fun. He still cries infrequently and is easily consoled when he does cry. He is also eating well, frequently and easily (albeit from a bottle). Daddy read a tip online about reducing spitup by keeping him vertical for 15-30 minutes after each feeding and that has made a HUGE difference in our laundry situation.

Breastfeeding is still the main issue and will continue to be the focus for a while. We're still running about 1/2 breastmilk and 1/2 formula, but all is being bottle fed while Jessica keeps her milk supply up by pumping.

Grandma Jackie arrived at 1:00 this morning, only a four-delay for no real reason by Northwest Airlines, which is pretty good for them. I think their reason for the delay was weather-related, which means it was a little too clear and sunny for their pilots to feel comfortable. Then it was too cloudy, then too dark. They're very touchy. 

In case anyone's missing my point, I suggest avoiding flying Northwest unless you have no viable alternatives. 

Charlie and daddy had a rough outing to the phlebotomist yesterday. Charlie was supposed to get another bilirubin test yesterday, since he was still looking a bit jaundiced on Tuesday. So daddy took Charlie to a local phlebotomist for the blood draw while mommy got some needed sleep. The phlebotomists were nice enough, but lacked experience drawing blood from newborns. After two failed attempts (one in the heel, one in the arm) daddy decided Charlie had had enough and was going back home. I actually think daddy was a lot more traumatized than Charlie, but it wasn't fun for either of us. We spoke to our pediatrician about the experience (and mentioned Charlie's both looking and acting a LOT less jaundiced than he was on Tuesday) and she agreed to give him a pass on the test until at least Friday when she seems him again. We're confident she'll take one look at him and say he doesn't need the test.

The arrival of Grandma Jackie frees up daddy to go see his Ear/Nose/Throat specialist to deal with the ear infection he's had since last week. Poor daddy. Actually it's not that bad. As a child, ear infections hurt me so much that I can still remember the pain, a little throb that I could feel as a "whoosh" with every heartbeat, but as an adult (yes, I still get them as an adult) it just feels like having a wet sock stuffed in your ear 24/7. Not exactly pleasant, but doesn't keep me awake at night crying either.

Wednesday, May 23rd 9:30 AM - Parental Christenings

Charlie christened me as his father last night during an evening feeding. The only thing I have to add about this photo is that Charlie peed on me less than 30 seconds after this picture was taken.  

 All signs pointing in positive directions. The Lactation consultant recommended renting a hospital-grade breast pump to help Jessica's milk supply come in (since Charlie was too lazy to do it himself, he's such a layabout). We called on Uncle Brodilama to find us a place that would deliver one to us and he did one better by finding a place that was AROUND THE CORNER FROM OUR APARTMENT. Twelve hours later and we've already replaced almost half his formula with breast milk (or maybe still colostrum). Good stuff.

Charlie continues to be a wonder. He still hardly ever cries, but he's much more active now that he's getting some more calories. He was hungry all night long, which didn't help the parental sleeping, but made us very happy nonetheless. 

Mom and Charlie together. Thank goodness he seems to look like his mom. Thanks to Uncle Brodilama and Auntie Bethie for the Snuggle Nest (the thing Charlie's in). It's a great thing for safely bed-sleeping little Charlie.

Our Doulas are coming by for a post-partum visit this morning. We're looking forward to seeing them. They're such wonderful, positive people.

Big thanks to all of you for all the good wishes, offers of help, and good thoughts. Even though we're not replying to even half of the messages and emails we're getting, please know that we relish all of them, and they are a TREMENDOUS lift for our spirits during the long sleepless nights when we feel so overwhelmed. 

A last picture for today, another Mom & Charlie shot. I keep meaning to get a crying Charlie picture, but to be honest his crying jags are so brief I haven't had a chance, so the pictures you're getting are a pretty accurate reflection of what he's like so far.

Tuesday, May 22 - 6:00 AM - Second night at home

Charlie wishes his Grandmother Vida a very happy birthday today! 

 The enormity of what we've done is starting to sink in. Charlie, his life, this little guy, is in our care. It feels too enormous, too unmanageable, too profound for us to take on. WHO entrusted with this? Why didn't we have to pass some test? To drive a car you have to take a class AND pass a test, but to raise a child all you have to do is make one? 

And yet, all over the world, every day, people give birth, care for and raise children. Surely we can do this. This is what we keep telling ourselves. 

As I type this, I'm actually wearing Charlie in a fleece pouch. Not sure if this will be so great when he's bigger, but for now, it's magic. He seems to love it, and I love carrying him around snuggled to my chest. Of course, ask me again in two months when it's 95 degrees out. 

Saw our pediatrician yesterday. He's lost weight (normal) but he's lost almost 8% of his body weight, which is not so normal. So we've had to use the dreaded formula to keep him from losing too much weight while we keep working on the breastfeeding. We're off to a lactation consultant in Great Neck this morning for more help with that. Charlie takes the formula OK, and we'll see our pediatrician this afternoon again. 

Charlie was also a little jaundiced (again, normal, but something to watch for) so we spent 20 minutes yesterday sunning him in a window (direct sunlight is good for jaundice). Made a nice pic, too. Hopefully this is me in San Gimignano in thirty years.

Jessica and I are managing to get some sleep, but it's an hour here, two hours there, etc. Hard to ever get more than two consecutive hours so far. I wouldn't have believed either of us could function as human beings like this for more than a few days, but it's been like this since Wednesday night (when labor started) and here we are, functioning.

The fatigue and the responsibility leaves us very raw. We're both prone to tears, but so far the majority of them have been happy tears. Jessica and I are so deeply in love with each other and  going through this together is bringing that into even sharper relief. We both know how exhausted and scared the other is, and yet as soon as one of us starts to show a crack in the armor, the other is right there to step in, take things over, give a kiss, a hug and keep the family going. How single women (or men) do this is utterly beyond my ability to comprehend.

 Jessica's mom (Jackie) arrives Wednesday night to stay with us for two weeks. Jackie, if you're reading this, THANK YOU! We can't wait for her to get here.

I'll leave everyone on a humorous note today. Brooke and Peter noticed this when they visited us in the hospital and made us take a picture. Their question, "Why did they write 'Jew' right on his baby card?" Once you take a closer look, you'll see it's the doctor's name. Of course, our doctor was actually Dr. Lily Wong (who was FANTASTIC) and we never even met Dr. Jew. But Charlie still got "Jew" written on his birth card.

Keep sending the good vibes and love everybody. We couldn't do this without all of you.

Monday, May 21 - 8:20 AM - First night at home

Our baby Charlie

Such a fierce love you have made

in your mom and dad 

We're home from the hospital. Got home safe and sound around 5:00 PM on Sunday via the Kim & Mary shuttle (thanks Kim & Mary!). As expected, first night was beyond tough, but all three of us survived. Jessica and I got through it by joking that we were losing our minds, because we were, in fact, losing our minds. It's been said many times before, but the whole 8x24 feeding schedule (one feeding at least every three hours) doesn't leave time for much else. Particularly when it's still such a struggle. Little Charlie likes to sleep most of the time, and once we get him latched onto a breast it's "suck, suck, zzzzzzzzzz". So we wake him up, get him a little fussy, latch him on again, and "suck, suck zzzzzzzzz.". And in this manner we spend about 60-90 minutes trying to get 50 quality sucks from the little guy, then try to sleep an hour, then try the whole thing again. We're working to get a lactation consultant to come visit us. If anyone knows one who does housecalls, let us know.

But the important thing is this:

He's an absolute miracle. We love him beyond description. We feel like we've known him our whole lives. 

Thanks to everyone for all the emails and phone messages. Please be understanding if we don't respond to any of them until Charlie's first birthday. Right now, it's all we can do to feed him and ourselves.

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Sunday, May 20 - 6:00 AM

Today begins the 3rd day of Charlie Putnam Peskay's life. The first day was a piece of cake, honestly, as Charlie slept most of it, and when he was awake was remarkably mellow even though he was also very alert. Day two got quite a bit tougher. We opted to stay in the hospital another night because Charlie still hasn't "latched on" properly and isn't getting good feedings. Jessica finally showed some fatigue (after four days without much sleep, plus labor, plus making difficult attempts to feed her baby every 2-3 hours). Trying to learn to breastfeed a baby is hard, at least so far. Charlie doesn't know what he's doing, Jessica doesn't know what she's doing, and they're both tired. They're both hanging in there, but it's tough. 

But of course, no one (and I mean NO ONE) ever said it would be easy. 

Remarkable amount of (ahem) output from the little fella, leading us to nickname him "Charlie the Chocolate Factory", although I doubt Willy Wonka will be selling the "chocolate" we've been finding in his diapers. 

The hospital doesn't let me (Joshua) stay the night, so I've been crashing on couches in the city to stay near the hospital. I'll be heading back to the hospital around eight to try and get them to let me in early to see Jessica and Charlie, who I miss so much I can't sleep away from them, which is too bad, because I need sleep too. I spent the whole night just seeing Charlie's eyes looking up at me from in my arms and thinking about Jessica there alone with him in the hospital. Well, two more hours and I'll be there with them.

We'll be going home today which is great (definitely ready to leave the hospital), but also scary because we'll be home alone with Charlie and we don't know what the hell we're doing.

Biggest challenges for today, getting Charlie to breastfeed properly and getting Jessica some sleep. These are not the most compatible of goals, but we'll keep working together to get them done, just like we've done with everything else in the ten + years we've been together.

Send us lots of love, luck and strength everyone, we need all we can get.